25 *sorry. Long reflective post ahead*.
Once a person reaches this pivotal age, there is no turning back from being in your 'late twenties'. I am trying very hard not to let that scare me.
What are my thoughts at this point of time?
Well, I must say I never thought I'd be where I am right now. Taiwan? Certainly not in the plans of a young Charis Chua, or even one 3 years ago. But what I'm doing and have been doing, I guess I've wanted to do since I was 16. I've wanted to sing, record, arrange and write songs. Also, I've wanted to tell/write stories [since I was 8]. Blogging, songwriting, even testifying and evax all falls into that category.
1 Corinthians 2:9-10 (New International Version)
9However, as it is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him"
10but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God
You know, when people quote this verse, they generally quote it halfway, and give the impression that God's ways so unsearchable. However, the following verse clearly states that even though we cannot even imagine what God's great and mighty plans for the future are, He REVEALS them by His Spirit to US.
When I was 17, I started to receive a long string of prophetic words from different ministers. They were strong and big words about my future and calling. Obviously, I had never thought about 90% of the things they were prophesying. And neither did my parents or friends. I was just a kid hard at work at my SPM [O-level] preparations. I had just recommitted my life to the Lord and my parents were still wary of my every move at that time. So yes, practically no eye or ear had any inkling of God's plans for me. But the Spirit was revealing. That was the start of the prophetic revelations. They have not stopped, though there are seasons when they are more frequent, and seasons when they are rare.
I never thought that I'd live my next 7 years in Australia, in cities I'd never even heard of much (Brisbane, Adelaide). But God led me to those cities, and to the Hope Movement [which I had never heard of either]. Who would have thought that I'd be supernaturally led to plant myself in this movement? I never realized I was gifted in evangelism, thought the many prophetic words spelled out that calling to witness. But the Spirit revealed it on a sunny winter's day in Adelaide to me personally about my direction while I was brushing my hair. It was the first time God spoke unmistakably to me. 'E-club. Join E-club'. The training for evax and the prophetic I've had under Peter has been amazing...something I couldn't have imagined myself.
I never imagined God would break me so much in the area of approval addiction, the tendency to perform and being under authority. He actually always revealed things he wanted to teach me long before any crisis happened. When I gave up my dream to sing and song-write, I never thought God would bring it back with 10 times the magnitude. But God revealed again, through His Spirit. Most of all, I never thought God would ask me to leave Australia for Taiwan. I mean, going home to Malaysia was more probable. But no, it was unknown, totally foreign Taiwan that He led me to.
You know, I could have turned away from this vision at any point of the journey. And there have been so many times my love grew cool, my steps wandered, my vision faltered. But because this plan is bigger than me, God never failed to redirect me back.
I was thinking, if I chose differently any many decision-making points, I would probably be married by now...or safely attached/engaged. I could be owning a house and car. I could be holidaying and travelling. I would have a stable job. I could have lots of friends around me. I would still be serving God actively....
But no, I guess I would have missed out on something greater at each point.
I'm almost 25. I'm single. I'm kinda poor, though in God I'm well-provided for. I own no assets. I have left all my friends and family [although I thank God for new friends here]. But would I trade the journey I'm on for anything right now? No. Because there is an incredible peace when you're in the centre of the will of God. Asia is where the centre of the Spirit's activity in the world is going to be in a very short time. And I am here, ready to be used and re-trained to catch more fish. And I'm living my calling.
I'm a nobody to most of the world at the moment. But I'm somebody to God. And when you're 25 or any age, I think that's all that matters.
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