This is a thanksgiving post. For 2010 and especially for my family in Malaysia.
I don't regret 2010. It has been one of the best years of my life. It almost tops 2003. 2003 has always been THE highlight year of happiness, spiritual growth and abundance for me. 2010 comes pretty close. 7 year cycle, how biblical and complete the number is [haha].
This is not to say that 2010 has had its moments that I wish I could have made more of. I've wasted quite a bit of time here and there doing nothing, and fretting while I was doing nothing. I've sometimes drowned my restlessness with too many youtube videos, online surfing and Facebook clicking. I've tossed around, not being able to sleep because internal rest is a struggle. I haven't really GRABBED every moment to make the most of them. But overall, I've been on the right path, I've met great people, God is smiling at me because I'm living the dream!!!!
Yes! I'm living the dream. Not just my dream, but the dream of God for me! How many people can say that? "What have you achieved, Charis?", some people might ask? It might not look like much, but the goal is not really so-called success in the eyes of the world. It might be nice when I get there, if ever. But REAL success, is knowing I can live from the favour of God. I'm not desperately trying to earn it. I'm relishing every step of the journey and the process. I have not settled for the easy, familiar way. I have not settled for the comfort zone. AND the crowning glory is the HE will be my reward. And CHARIS is also God's reward. Isn't that amazing that He thinks I am His reward? *selah (meaning pause and reflect)
There are actually so many milestones that I've achieved in 2010. Might mean nothing to other people. But between God and I, we're champs! :) I'm a champ! In His eyes, I'm always a champ when I just walk in obedience. And I'm loved unconditionally EVEN when I make mistakes or I sin.
So many things have happened. A little sample (this is not even half of the great stuff that I should be giving thanks for):
- 2010 officially started at the end of 2009. Releasing the EP, as awkward and non-polished as I think it is, it was a first step to compile everything, and to plan for the career. All the crazy work that went to thinking of concepts, career direction, financial planning, etc.
- Performing with the my hometown youth orchestra as a guest vocalist and arranger
- I landed in Taipei and got a place to stay. My landlord's family has blessed me in many ways.
- Arranged orchestral pieces for a GOOD TV evangelistic meeting. First time doing so for a full symphony orchestra.
- Sang as a back-up vocalist/pianist at many inter-church conferences, evangelistic meetings, church services. I thank God for my 'god-dad', JP who's been the one who's given me most of these opportunities to serve. I thank God for the privilege of serving in my little life-group. It is a great honour to serve in a small, nuclear, uncomplicated environment. It's not for show, not for the stage, just being together with spiritual family.
- Met SO MANY new friends and musos who have been a great source of blessing, encouragement and inspiration to me.
- Arranged many songs for GOOD TV 宁静时分(Quiet Time) recordings. I've played piano, I've sang solo, I've been a back-up vocalist, I've arranged for other teams.
- Arranged 4 songs, and did studio recording sessions for for Samuel Tai邰正宵
- Did session vocal work for different artists.
- Attended many gigs. 酷爱，神木玉童，Joanna Wang, Fish Leong, VC Tan, Yen-J, Shih ying-ying, 7 Shekels, Waa, Little Fatty, 刘庚宏, Shih Ying-ying, Ray Lin.
- Wrote/collaborated 黑咖啡, Butterfly, 七月的阳光, Phantom Pain, 慢慢 in Chinese. Never thought I'd write anything in Chinese after so long.
- Wrote songs for Tendayi’s play in South Africa
- Launched into Youtube.
HOWEVER, the biggest thing that I feel so grateful for is my family. I'm the only one so far who has left the country after high school, and I've been nomadic since then. Living in my 4th city now. Upon hindsight, it was best to leave after high school considering the circumstances in hometown at that time. Hence the clear leading of God to leave for Australia. But I've lived for 7 years in Australia, only returning for about 6 weeks a year. This inevitably has been the reason behind my rather distant relationship with my sisters, and missing out on everyone's important occasions...like birthdays, anniversaries, even Christmas.
It has been an incredible blessing to be home more often in 2010. I've been able to celebrate the birthdays of my parents and sisters, and even plan a surprise birthday for my mom. After 7 years of not being able to bless them, it's very cool to be able to be part of all of this. I also got the chance to spend more time with my sisters from Jan-March, to the extent that they probably miss me for the first time in so many years when I left.
My family has been behind me every step of this new and sometimes scary journey into the calling and the destiny God has for me. They've been there for me financially, with moral support, with prayers. How blessed am I to be able to pray with my whole family when I make decisions? How blessed am I to have a godly, compassionate leader for a Dad; a detailed, thoughtful and caring Mom; and wacky sisters who are talented, who love God and hear from Him as well? Oh and they are my loyal fans :)
You know, if I never achieve anything else, and I have to stop this journey right here, I deem 2010 worth it because of what I've gained in terms of the deepening of relationships with my family.
My Daddy in heaven. I have so much to be thankful for. The journey is just beginning. And it has all been worth it despite the many pains and fears that only You know about. There will be so many more trials and so many more victories and maybe even mistakes and failures. But all through this, I am reminding myself that YOU are my reward. This journey is one of faith and so it pleases You. And that is all I'm asking for...that at the end of my life, that YOU are my reward, YOU are my portion and prize, and WE got there TOGETHER. I will look back and see You at every step and know that it was all worth it. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
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