A little rant.
I'm tired of watching my weight.
I'm tired of being so conscious of flab.
I'm tired of feeling like a failure because I don't have abs.
I'm not the TV/video/photo friendly 45 kilos.
I'm not size zero. I wasn't born with size zero genes.
It's not right that it should bother me so much but it does.
Almost everyone here tells me the same thing. If I want to release my music and start promoting it, I need to lose weight. I need to lose at least 5 kilos ( which will still not bring me to the magic 45 kilos).
I don't know how to lose 5 kilos without being terribly moody and hungry.
I will probably need to exercise 2 hours a day, and cut my calorie intake to 1000 and 1500 alternatively a day. And absolutely no desserts, no fatty food, no sleeping late.
The thing is, if I was an athlete, I'd be motivated to adhere to a strict diet and regime, no problem. Because my work is physical, and I see the purpose of keeping my body at it's peak condition.
But I'm a musician!! It's really hard to justify all the crappy feelings that come from such a diet or regime.If I just don't care, and let it be, I'm afraid I'll just become a blob. And they will say, you are not disciplined enough for this business.
Sigh. Not exactly in the best of moods.
This is such a shallow to thing to be concerned about. Unspiritual....?.....It's a lose-lose situation to me.
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